When I was a young college student at Glassboro State College (now Rowan University) in New Jersey, I had a friend who was a fellow journalism major. We both landed a brief stint working for NBC during the 1988 Presidential Primaries. I will never forget this particular day; I was driving over to the studio and was extremely nervous because the job would involve speaking by phone to reporters out on the field and then reporting election results with a group of others which would later be recounted on the air. As a hearing impaired individual, I didn’t have the confidence that I could do the job but at the same time didn’t want to pass up an opportunity to work for NBC.
So on this day, I voiced my concerns to my friend Bonnie who just looked at me and said, “Josie, you know you can do it. You’re going to do great. Shake it off.” I smiled appreciatively and kept driving. Soon after, Bridge Over Troubled Water (Simon and Garfunkel) came on the radio and Bonnie and another friend just started singing. I have never forgotten that experience. It put a smile on my face; I calmed down and later went on to do the job.
To this day, I often think of Bonnie when I hear this song. We have since lost touch, but I will never forget her act of kindness and encouragement when I needed it most. Yet, sadly, I didn’t give it a second thought then.
There is a popular poem that says people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. One of my favorites, it reads:
Reason, Season, or Lifetime
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
Too often, we don’t recognize the significance of the moment until much later when it’s too late to say thank you. I honestly don’t know if Bonnie would even remember that day but if I saw her today I’d say thank you and give her a hug.
Sometimes we get so caught up in the everyday events of our lives that we don’t take the time to recognize the moments and the people who make it all worthwhile. I recently read about an interesting exercise that helps to bring this concept to light. Imagine a room full of all the important people in your life. Now imagine that each person begins to exit the room. Who are the people who make this room feel empty when they leave even though others are still in the room?
We tend to take the people we love the most for granted. In our own minds, we think they will always be there. Maybe they will be and maybe they won’t. But isn’t it better to at least recognize the value of a relationship while you still can?
Whatever the reason, whatever the season, take the time to let your friends know how much you appreciate them. Why not let them know how much you care right now. Sometimes in life, we don’t get second chances. Make the most of the moments you are given.
This blog is dedicated to the beautiful, priceless friends in my life, both old and new. I love you and thank you for being a vital thread in the security blanket I hold close to my heart.